My Mistress' Eyes Are Nothing Like.... Attila the Hun?

- February 18, 2011

Sam Zucchi, winner of the Valentine's Day sonnet contest (Katherine Woller photo)

On February 11, the English Department hosted the annual Valentine’s Day Sonnet Contest results at the Grawood, recognizing the creative talents of English scholars from both Dalhousie and King’s. The party began at 4 p.m. with an introduction by English Chair Christina Luckyj to a substantial crowd of poets, fellow students and friends, and faculty members.

Dr. Luckyj says that the contest, which is open to English majors and English Honours students (including students in the Creative Writing program), “encourages the talents of English students who don’t usually get the chance to write creatively, while offering further practice for Creative Writing students.” The contest asks for entries in any recognized sonnet form that focus on a theme related to Valentine’s Day—whether it be a warm or bitter account of love, or a humorous spoof on the holiday.

Master of ceremonies and fellow undergrad student DJ Rossi welcomed audience members as they enjoyed free pizza, and asked contestants to read their entries on stage. Poets shared sonnets about everything from playground cooties to Attila the Hun. The sonnets employed beautiful language to tackle dark topics, careful metaphor to describe relationships, and clever play-on words to tackle such subjects as the finesse of texting lingo. 

After the readings, Mr. Rossi announced the winners of monetary prizes with the help of enthusiastic drum-rolls from the crowd.

Honourable mention went to Tessa Eisenberg, who proved that experience in love is not necessary to be a poet in her sonnet “Poetry for One”.

Third place went to fourth-year King’s student Ella Rowan. Ms. Rowan, who is currently pursuing English Honours, submitted an entertaining piece from a highly creative point of view.

A Valentine’s Day Sonnet by Attila the Hun

Of course there are those who love pretty things,
Like roses and puppies and sugar sweets,
But as for me, my heart will only sing
For carnage, mayhem, pain, and bloody meat.
The piercing cries of ravished maids arouse
A tenderness that melts my heart of ice;
The acrid scent of burning down a house
My nostril fills with sweetness. To entice
Attila to come curl up at your feet,
Offer not choc’lates, that just won’t suffice.
I’d rather a roasted boar for a treat
Or ‘haps a baby’s head upon a spike.
Attila hates to love, and loves to hate;
Lady, please: be my dinner and my date!

      -- Ella Rowan

Joanna Marsh won second place for her witty critique of the absurd and illogical traditions of Valentine’s Day, titled “The Hard Truths about Valentine’s."

The Hard Truths about Valentine’s

A seed that Chaucer planted in the mind
In honour of his king’s amorous youth
And Hallmark made a thousand of the kind
And in not even one a grain of truth.
For Valentine was not a saint of love,
His acts, it’s said, “are known only to God.”
No crow in February mates, no dove,
So calling his day romantic is odd.
Red candles, red candies, profane treasures,
These things are rife with ‘sin’ and ‘Satan’s taint’.
Think when you enjoy any of these pleasures:
When was excess the province of a saint?
And puppy love? And songs that lovers sing?
As if the Church would approve with no ring.

    -- Joanna Marsh

First place honours were claimed by fourth-year King’s student Sam Zucchi for his beautifully crafted contemplation of immortality and love. Mr. Zucchi’s perseverance has paid off, as his win came after four years of participation in the contest.  

Sonnet VII

I wake, and in waking wince at the light
Cast by the noisome lamp that stands outside.
I close the blinds to restore antique night,
And see you lying still, as though you’d died.
You’re sadly silent, now taken as Night’s own,
Haled far from me—and I alone with this tomb
And these words, the lonely mourner’s drone,
And the slumber that foretells some other doom.
Yet you softly stir, and return to life—
Though still asleep, still driven by some hope.
And I, sole witness to this subtle strife,
Wonder at other triumphs beyond my scope.
So I rest, thinking at the close of eye
Not of death, but love, and what else dreams may scry.

      -- Sam Zucchi

No contestant left the event empty-handed, as boxes of chocolates were given to all of the other participants.

Dr. Luckyj explains that, not only is the sonnet the quintessential expression of love, it is also “a strict poetic structure that challenges students to be creative by varying and modifying a traditional form.”

The contest is facilitated through an annual fund of Alumni contributions. More details can be found on the English Department website.


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