Mind your forks and knives

Students Joseph Schow, Shelley Alexander, and Brittany Houweling attended the lunch to pick up etiquette tips. (Nick Pearce Photo)

Ever panic when you sit down for an important meal and there are two forks, two spoons and three knives set out in before you?

Karen Mallett knows what to do and she shared her wisdom with more than 150 students over lunch recently. Next time students sit down at a fancy dinner table, they’ll know which fork to pick up and when.
Etiquette is not just about the meals though. It’s about how we interact with others.

“You are affecting peoples’ lives by the way you treat them,” says Ms. Mallett, owner of the training company Civility Works, stressing that knowing the rules of etiquette is a skill. “To have these skills just gives you that one extra edge in life. You have to give yourself that chance to upgrade your skills.”

The students who attended the educational luncheon certainly received a lot of advice on how to develop their skills. Ms. Mallett covered everything from cutlery to conversation, and first impressions to limiting your consumption of “liquid courage” (also known as alcohol).

Laurie Girdwood is a 22-year-old management student who attended the luncheon, which was organized by the Career Services Centre. She says she found the whole event very useful.

“There’s a lot of stuff I didn’t know – things you are supposed to do and not supposed to do.”

Etiquette expert Karen Mallett. (Nick Pearce Photo)

Ms. Mallett began the luncheon by describing etiquette, which is not meant to make people feel uncomfortable. “Don’t correct people. Only I’m allowed to do that,” she joked.

She went on to ask the audience what they thought were the three most important attributes of a first impression. The number-one attribute is posture. A few slumped backs were straightened when she said that one.

Closely following posture is a clean and neat appearance and then listening skills. What makes all of this so unnerving is that statistics say that you only have 120 seconds to make a first impression!

Ms. Mallett emphasized the importance of turning off your phone and making eye contact.

“There’s nothing more important than the people you are with,” she told the audience.

As she covered first impressions, servers came out with the first course. Ms. Mallett then went on to cover the technical aspects of eating a meal. While people ate the main course, Fettuccini Alfredo, she walked among the tables and answered individual questions.

“She was very clearly spoken. She explained herself very well,” said Andrew Valeri, a 27-year MBA and law student at Dal.

Ms. Mallett says etiquette has always played a strong role in her life, since she was brought up in a home in which respect and civility were continuously emphasized. Now, she enjoys passing that same respect and civility to others through her job. 

As for which cutlery to use first during a meal: start with the outside fork and work your way in.